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What We Carry: A Memoir Spiral-Bound | April 6, 2021
Maya Shanbhag Lang
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What We Carry: A Memoir
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“A gorgeous memoir about mothers, daughters, and the tenacity of the love that grows between what is said and what is left unspoken.”—Mira Jacob, author of Good Talk
If our family stories shape us, what happens when we learn those stories were never true? Who do we become when we shed our illusions about the past?
Maya Shanbhag Lang grew up idolizing her brilliant mother, an accomplished physician who immigrated to the United States from India and completed her residency all while raising her children and keeping a traditional Indian home. Maya’s mother had always been a source of support—until Maya became a mother herself. Then the parent who had once been so capable and attentive became suddenly and inexplicably unavailable. Struggling to understand this abrupt change while raising her own young child, Maya searches for answers and soon learns that her mother is living with Alzheimer’s.
Unable to remember or keep track of the stories she once told her daughter—stories about her life in India, why she immigrated, and her experience of motherhood—Maya’s mother divulges secrets about her past that force Maya to reexamine their relationship. It becomes clear that Maya never really knew her mother, despite their close bond. Absorbing, moving, and raw, What We Carry is a memoir about mothers and daughters, lies and truths, receiving and giving care, and how we cannot grow up until we fully understand the people who raised us. It is a beautiful examination of the weight we shoulder as women and an exploration of how to finally set our burdens down.
Praise for What We Carry
"Part self-discovery, part family history. . . [Lang's] analysis of the shifting roles of mothers and daughters, particularly through the lens of immigration, help[s] to challenge her family’s mythology. . . . Readers interested in examining their own family stories . . . will connect deeply with Lang’s beautiful memoir."—Library Journal
(Starred Review)
“A stirring memoir exploring the fraught relationships between mothers and daughters . . . astutely written and intense . . . [What We Carry] will strike a chord with readers.”—Publishers Weekly
“Lang is an immediately affable and honest narrator who offers an intriguing blend of revelatory personal history and touching insight.”—BookPagePraise for What We Carry:
"A dazzling, courageous memoir about the weight we carry as women, daughters, and mothers--and what happens when we let go--What We Carry is a love letter to everyone who has swum through turbulent water before reaching the shores of selfhood." Chloe Benjamin, New York Times bestselling author of The Immortalists "Maya Shanbhag Lang thought she knew her capable physician-mother, but when Alzheimer's hit her mother early, Lang found herself adrift in a sea of unwelcome truths and ambiguous loss. Anyone facing the ordeal of caregiving, with all its love, loss, and unexpected gifts, will be inspired by this searing and extraordinary memoir." Katy Butler, New York Times bestselling author of Knocking on Heaven's Door "What We Carry is a wise, tender, and unswervingly honest memoir that reads like a mystery. With emotional precision, Maya Shanbhag Lang investigates the many ways we participate in the often-painful mythology of family. Just as thrillingly, Lang's ultimate revelation is a hopeful one, reminding us that we are stronger than we think." Christopher Castellani, author of Leading Men "A profoundly moving memoir about secrets and trauma . . . In exquisite prose, Maya Shanbhag Lang writes about her extraordinary mother and the cruel circumstances that complicate their relationship. At its heart, What We Carry is about one of the greatest gifts any parent can give a child: the power to save yourself." Will Schwalbe, New York Times bestselling author of The End of Your Life Book Club "How do we really know the ones we love? Lang thought she knew her Indian immigrant mother through her stories until profound truths and unsettling secrets began to emerge, giving Lang an opportunity to come to terms with the ties that bound them. Truly, this is a gorgeous memoir." Caroline Leavitt, New York Times bestselling author of Pictures of You "Part self-discovery, part family history. . . [Lang's] analysis of the shifting roles of mothers and daughters, particularly through the lens of immigration, help[s] to challenge her family's mythology. . . . Readers interested in examining their own family stories . . . will connect deeply with Lang's beautiful memoir." Library Journal (Starred Review) "A stirring memoir exploring the fraught relationships between mothers and daughters . . . astutely written and intense . . . [What We Carry] will strike a chord with readers." Publishers Weekly "Lang is an immediately affable and honest narrator who offers an intriguing blend of revelatory personal history and touching insight." BookPage
Praise for Maya Lang's debut nove, The Sixteenth of June:
"The Sixteenth of June is incisive and revelatory, a finely-tuned novel of friendship, loss, and self-forgiveness. This is a new voice of the highest caliber, one that articulates the things we never knew we thought, the things we never thought we knew. If Joyce was a master of epiphany, Maya Lang is one, too." Rebecca Makkai, author of The Great Believers "Clever and well-crafted, this absorbing novel explores the interplay of love, ambition, and family. It's a delightful blend of emotional resonance and graceful prose." Ayelet Waldman, author of A Really Good Day "Maya Lang's exquisitely written debut is at heart a love story, a triangle, that swirls around issues of passion, pretension, and the way art can be both a salvation and a crutch. Readers will see some of themselves in these two brothers, Stephen and Leopold, and the sensitive young woman they both adore. A triumph." Helen Schulman, New York Times bestselling author of Come With Me and This Beautiful Life "The Sixteenth of June has deep and intricate roots. The novel takes place over a single day and yet, for Stephen, Leopold and Nora, it is from these tangled roots that a lifetime of love and hope will grow. This is a big-hearted and generous novel." Ramona Ausubel, author of Awayland and The Sons and Daughters of Ease and Plenty "One of the summer's hottest reads."--CBS "A literary bridge between the City of Brotherly Love and James Joyce's enigmatic masterpiece." --The Philadelphia Inquirer "A perfect book for fans of Jonathan Tropper, Meg Wolitzer and, yes, James Joyce." The Minneapolis Star Tribune "Addictive, outstanding, and with many Joycean references, The Sixteenth of June... elevates family dysfunction to an art form."Shelf Awareness "Taking place on a single day, like James Joyce's Ulysses, Lang's clever first novel tracks three twentysomethings... . They all find some resolution by the end of the day, although it isn't necessarily the one they expected or hoped for... . What matters more is the family dynamic and its currents of longing, loss, and love."Booklist "A promising writer gives the love triangle an engaging workout."Kirkus Reviews "Lang's writing is clear and self-assured, and despite being based on Ulysses, it is a pleasure to read. Lang's metaphors are beautiful. With humor and insight, she ends up creating [...] a novel that reflects modern life." Bookreporter "Lang's wonderfully engaging prose and her believable characters overtook me. [...] Lang's characters, like all of us, are trying to live out a hypothetical other life for themselves, to experiment privately with a life that could have lead but ultimately did not." The Millions
If our family stories shape us, what happens when we learn those stories were never true? Who do we become when we shed our illusions about the past?
Maya Shanbhag Lang grew up idolizing her brilliant mother, an accomplished physician who immigrated to the United States from India and completed her residency all while raising her children and keeping a traditional Indian home. Maya’s mother had always been a source of support—until Maya became a mother herself. Then the parent who had once been so capable and attentive became suddenly and inexplicably unavailable. Struggling to understand this abrupt change while raising her own young child, Maya searches for answers and soon learns that her mother is living with Alzheimer’s.
Unable to remember or keep track of the stories she once told her daughter—stories about her life in India, why she immigrated, and her experience of motherhood—Maya’s mother divulges secrets about her past that force Maya to reexamine their relationship. It becomes clear that Maya never really knew her mother, despite their close bond. Absorbing, moving, and raw, What We Carry is a memoir about mothers and daughters, lies and truths, receiving and giving care, and how we cannot grow up until we fully understand the people who raised us. It is a beautiful examination of the weight we shoulder as women and an exploration of how to finally set our burdens down.
Praise for What We Carry
"Part self-discovery, part family history. . . [Lang's] analysis of the shifting roles of mothers and daughters, particularly through the lens of immigration, help[s] to challenge her family’s mythology. . . . Readers interested in examining their own family stories . . . will connect deeply with Lang’s beautiful memoir."—Library Journal
(Starred Review)
“A stirring memoir exploring the fraught relationships between mothers and daughters . . . astutely written and intense . . . [What We Carry] will strike a chord with readers.”—Publishers Weekly
“Lang is an immediately affable and honest narrator who offers an intriguing blend of revelatory personal history and touching insight.”—BookPagePraise for What We Carry:
Praise for Maya Lang's debut nove, The Sixteenth of June:
Publisher: Penguin Random House
Original Binding: Trade Paperback
Pages: 304 pages
ISBN-10: 0525512411
Item Weight: 0.5 lbs
Dimensions: 5.2 x 0.6 x 8.0 inches
“This memoir is more than the sum of its parts. . . . [It] becomes a larger meditation on motherhood, daughterhood and feminism—claiming oneself above all, and the moral struggle involved in doing so. . . . In exquisitely precise prose, Lang makes an argument that honesty is what’s truly empowering.”—Mary Beth Keane, The New York Times Book Review
“A book with such a brave message.”—The Observer
“What We Carry is an exquisite exploration of the boundlessness and limitations of love that makes us examine the unknowability of who we are and the strength of our bonds with those who shape us. This story is so elegantly told, with such rawness and compassion, that I fell madly in love with Maya Shanbhag Lang and her complicated, unforgettable mother and could not put this book down.”—Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone
“Nothing short of radical.”—Los Angeles Review of Books
“A dazzling, courageous memoir about the weight we carry as women, daughters, and mothers—and what happens when we let go—What We Carry is a love letter to everyone who has swum through turbulent water before reaching the shores of selfhood.”—Chloe Benjamin, New York Times bestselling author of The Immortalists
“Maya Shanbhag Lang thought she knew her capable physician-mother, but when Alzheimer’s hit her mother early, Lang found herself adrift in a sea of unwelcome truths and ambiguous loss. Anyone facing the ordeal of caregiving, with all its love, loss, and unexpected gifts, will be inspired by this searing and extraordinary memoir.”—Katy Butler, New York Times bestselling author of Knocking on Heaven’s Door
“What We Carry is a wise, tender, and unswervingly honest memoir that reads like a mystery. With emotional precision, Maya Shanbhag Lang investigates the many ways we participate in the often-painful mythology of family. Just as thrillingly, Lang’s ultimate revelation is a hopeful one, reminding us that we are stronger than we think.”—Christopher Castellani, author of Leading Men
“A profoundly moving memoir about secrets and trauma . . . In exquisite prose, Maya Shanbhag Lang writes about her extraordinary mother and the cruel circumstances that complicate their relationship. At its heart, What We Carry is about one of the greatest gifts any parent can give a child: the power to save yourself.”—Will Schwalbe, New York Times bestselling author of The End of Your Life Book Club
“How do we really know the ones we love? Lang thought she knew her Indian immigrant mother through her stories until profound truths and unsettling secrets began to emerge, giving Lang an opportunity to come to terms with the ties that bound them. Truly, this is a gorgeous memoir.”—Caroline Leavitt, New York Times bestselling author of Pictures of You
“A book with such a brave message.”—The Observer
“What We Carry is an exquisite exploration of the boundlessness and limitations of love that makes us examine the unknowability of who we are and the strength of our bonds with those who shape us. This story is so elegantly told, with such rawness and compassion, that I fell madly in love with Maya Shanbhag Lang and her complicated, unforgettable mother and could not put this book down.”—Lori Gottlieb, New York Times bestselling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone
“Nothing short of radical.”—Los Angeles Review of Books
“A dazzling, courageous memoir about the weight we carry as women, daughters, and mothers—and what happens when we let go—What We Carry is a love letter to everyone who has swum through turbulent water before reaching the shores of selfhood.”—Chloe Benjamin, New York Times bestselling author of The Immortalists
“Maya Shanbhag Lang thought she knew her capable physician-mother, but when Alzheimer’s hit her mother early, Lang found herself adrift in a sea of unwelcome truths and ambiguous loss. Anyone facing the ordeal of caregiving, with all its love, loss, and unexpected gifts, will be inspired by this searing and extraordinary memoir.”—Katy Butler, New York Times bestselling author of Knocking on Heaven’s Door
“What We Carry is a wise, tender, and unswervingly honest memoir that reads like a mystery. With emotional precision, Maya Shanbhag Lang investigates the many ways we participate in the often-painful mythology of family. Just as thrillingly, Lang’s ultimate revelation is a hopeful one, reminding us that we are stronger than we think.”—Christopher Castellani, author of Leading Men
“A profoundly moving memoir about secrets and trauma . . . In exquisite prose, Maya Shanbhag Lang writes about her extraordinary mother and the cruel circumstances that complicate their relationship. At its heart, What We Carry is about one of the greatest gifts any parent can give a child: the power to save yourself.”—Will Schwalbe, New York Times bestselling author of The End of Your Life Book Club
“How do we really know the ones we love? Lang thought she knew her Indian immigrant mother through her stories until profound truths and unsettling secrets began to emerge, giving Lang an opportunity to come to terms with the ties that bound them. Truly, this is a gorgeous memoir.”—Caroline Leavitt, New York Times bestselling author of Pictures of You
Maya Shanbhag Lang is the author of What We Carry, named a New York Times Editors’ Choice, a “Good Morning America” Mother's Day pick, and a Must-Read/Best of 2020 Memoir by Bustle, BookRiot, Parade, Times of India, and others. She is also the author of The Sixteenth of June, long listed for The Center for Fiction First Novel Prize and named a Must-Read Novel by CBS and InStyle. Her work has been featured in The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Los Angeles Review of Books, and others. She holds a PhD in Comparative Literature, received the Neil Shepard Prize in Fiction, and is the daughter of South Asian immigrants.